


She Ran Away In Her Sleep (And Dreamed Of Paradise)

by Baccatapages



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alpha!Bucky, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dubious Consent, F/M, Fluff, Pregnancy, The Winter Soldier - Freeform, feral!bucky, omega!reader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-30
Updated: 2019-08-30
Packaged: 2020-09-30 09:48:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20445143
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Baccatapages/pseuds/Baccatapages
Summary: Your world does not make sense, plainly put.It's just... wrong.Omegas cannot conceive outside a loving bond, emphasis on loving. Hydra wants more super soldiers and wants the Winter Soldier to be the sire. Forcing him on an omega wouldn't work, but if both their minds and bodies could be tricked into believing they lived a happy, domestic life? Well, then pups would be along in no time.





	She Ran Away In Her Sleep (And Dreamed Of Paradise)

**Author's Note:**

> Title from Paradise by Coldplay
> 
> Tagged as Rape/Non-Con because... well, clear consent is not proved here but there's nothing graphic, i promise, it's just suggested. Either way, i thought i'd tag just in case.

Something is wrong with this world, you thought as you washed the dishes in the sink. You gaze drifted to the window where you saw your husband returning from work. And there was your problem. Your husband, James, was sweet. Handsome. Kind. Smart. Caring. Gentle. You adored him with all your heart, and he loved you with the entirety of his. But for the life of you, you couldn’t remember things about him. You didn’t know if he had any siblings, or even his precise age. Whenever you asked, he always waved you off. Changed the subject.

Supposedly, you’d met by chance when he bent to pick up a book that had fallen out of your bag at the same time you did. The rest was history, your romance a whirlwind of emotions, so much so that you struggled to remember specific details.

And the dreams were the worst. You always dreamed of a sterile, cold room and overwhelming fear. Sometimes you dreamed of another life in a house just off a beautiful river where, from the balcony, you could watch the sunset at your leisure. A cherry tree growing outside the window, bearing succulent and sweet lemons each year. A distant part of you yearned for that life that was just out of reach.

“Hey there.” You felt arms wrap around your waist and an alpha’s voice growling softly in your ear. “You think we did it, last night? I’ve been weak in the knees all day, doll. I have a good feeling we made a pup last night. Maybe even two.”

Ah, yes. There was the matter that James wanted pups, always wanted pups since he was a pup himself, so you were told. It hadn’t happened yet, though not for lack of trying.

You picked up a tea towel and dried your hands, turning in his embrace and taking him and his homely scent in. “Maybe, i- is that blood?” You zeroed in on the gash on his face. “What happened?”

James frowned. “What blood? Are you okay?” You blinked and his wound was gone. He pulled you closer, sniffing for the blood you mentioned. “You’re not hurt, are you?”

“No, no, I just thought-“ You shook your head. “Nevermind.”

Your alpha cupped your cheek, brushing his nose with yours. “You’d tell me if you weren’t feeling well, right? I don’t want you to suffer in silence.”

“Of course I would.”

Both you and James had nightmares, though his were more akin to night terrors. You’d started feeling ill that night, falling asleep before seven. By the time you managed to pull yourself out from your nightmare of _coldsterilefearwhereamiiwanttogohomethat’snotmyalphaidon’thaveanalpha_, James was thrashing and moaning, terrified of something.

“James.” You hissed, trying to wake him up. He was thrashing enough for you to gingerly climb out of bed. You rapped your knuckles on the wall and James stopped thrashing, sitting bolt upright. His eyes were unseeing as they looked at you, definitely seeing something you couldn’t see as he prowled out of bed towards you like a hunter stalking prey.

James was snarling something in Russian, a language you didn’t even know he could speak, and he was scaring you. He reached for you with his arm - _ohgodhisarm’smetal_ – and pinned you to the wall by your neck in an unrelenting grip.

Your alpha suddenly jerked and pulled his hand away, awareness finally returning to his eyes. “Doll? Oh, omega, I’m so sorry- I never meant-“ as he reached for you again, you cringed away even though every instinct within you screamed at you to go to your alpha for comfort.

“Don’t.” You rasped. “Just don’t.”

Your alpha was banished to the sofa, despite your instinct’s protests. As you dreamed, a red haze fell down upon you.

_This was very bizarre. _

_You’d never dreamed anything like this before. You were standing knee-deep in a river, barefoot. It was a strange sensation. _

_“Please don’t be alarmed.” _

_Your head shot up to see a woman standing on the banks of the river. She had dark red brown hair and was approaching you as if you were a caged animal. “Who are you?”_

_“My name is Wanda. I’m with the Avengers. You’re being held prisoner by Hydra, a neo-Nazi organisation.” She said quickly, her voice laced with an accent. You blinked. “I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to reach you. I can’t imagine what you’ve been through, but you need to wake up.”_

_“But I am awake?”_

_“No, really wake up. Go back to the sterile room, move your body. _Retake control_.” She urged. “There are defences around the base we cannot penetrate. You need to disarm them.”_

_“But I don’t know anything about defences and disarming!” You protested._

_“It will come naturally, Y/n, I promise. Just please; retake control.”_

_“But-“_

Some part of you was dragging yourself back to the place you didn’t like. The cold room. The white walls. The sterile smell. The chair you were tied to.

In your periphery, you could see an IV stand on your left with a bag labelled saline attached. Moving your hand felt like lifting a hundred sandbags at once, but you did it. You pulled the needle out and swung your dead weight legs off the side of the chair.

Upon leaving the support of the chair, you fell to your knees. With a tremendous effort, you pulled yourself back up and went to the door. In the glass’ reflection, you could see James’ mating mark over your scent gland. In a fit of anger, you punched your reflection and your fist slipped through easily, like you were punching through paper. You unlocked the door from the outside and started moving through the corridors.

You shivered, partially from cold and partially from nausea. Without apparent reason, you threw up, retching up bile and god knows what. Wrinkling your nose, you stepped over the puddle of sick to try and find where the defence controls were kept.

Helpfully, there was a door that said ‘Control Room’ on it. You barged your way in, still dazed and unable to properly focus. A pair of techs were in there and they gave alarmed cries. Evidently, they were trying not to hurt you in any permanent way. Still, you threw one into a wall with a sickening crack and punched another so hard their neck snapped.

As if some higher power was making things a hundred times easier for you, you saw the computer one of the techs had been working at had a list of the base’s defences and their controls. With fumbling hands, you lowered all the defences and disabled the missiles that were set to launch.

It wasn’t long before shouts and cries reached your ears. Still, nothing felt real. It was like a waking dream. A living nightmare and you just wanted to go back to your alpha’s embrace and warm scent. You wanted to go home.

When you fell, you felt a pair of strong arms catch you.

A quick glance around the room told you that your suspicions were correct. That life you lived with your alpha was just a dream. Still, you mourned that life.

Sitting in a chair next to your bed was a pair of females, one alpha the other beta. They were talking quietly and you recognised their voices and their scents. “Where am I?” You rasped out.

“At the Avengers compound.” The female alpha with hair like fire said gently.

“How do you feel, Y/n?” The Beta asked.

“I-“ You blinked at her. “I remember you. We played in the town square while Mother and Father sold food at the market.”

The beta smiled sadly. “Yes, we did.” She took your hand. “I’m so sorry this happened to you, Y/n.”

“What did happen to me?”

“We don’t know.” Female alpha – Nat, some part of you whispered – admitted. “Only a vague idea.”

They let you rest and the next time you awoke, your mind was even clearer. You were now fairly certain that the two were called Nat and Wanda, while another young man you called Pietro. You wondered why he was crying when he saw you, but he simply clung to you like a child, sobbing against your neck.

More and more people visited, people who cried with relief at your return and people who cried in anger at you being taken. Still, you remembered bits and pieces about most of them and it was slowly coming together.

Every now and then, you could feel your alpha tugging on the bond between you. It was concern, mostly. Sometimes anger, sometimes fear.

One day, Steve knocked on your door gently and you waved him in, moving back to the bed from where you’d just gone to the toilet. “Hi, Y/n. I was hoping you’d be able to talk about what happened now.”

“Oh, okay.” You settled back against the pillows, Steve plumping them for you.

“We’ve managed to decade the intel from the base.” He said. “We’ve decoded it, well, FRIDAY did. And, well, they were trying to create more Winter Soldiers.”

You blinked. “Oh.”

“And the highest chance of succeeding was to put both of you in a… well, psychic dream I suppose.”

“Domestic bliss.” You said dully.

Steve nodded. “You were with him for three months. Did you manage to-“

“Somewhere in the first month, I think.” You gazed down at your slightly taught stomach.

James/Bucky/The Winter Soldier was still scattered among the winds, apparently. No one could find him. Apparently, shortly before the Avengers arrived, he’d been sent off to another mission. Where? They had no idea.

The months ticked along and by the time you were six months along, you remembered almost everything of your life before. Fleeing from Sokovia and the hate that seemed to ooze from its very walls, changing your name to start a new life, being recruited to the Avengers for the occasional mission, your twin brother and sister finding you again after you watched Sokovia crumble.

Your eyes shot open one night, laying on your side. You glanced up and saw a dark figure looming over you, icy pale eyes probing your very soul. This man was nothing like your alpha who was sweet and warm and kind. This man, this monster frightened you with his black gear and mask, a whole weapon stock strapped to his body.

A blood-curdling scream reached your ears and it took you a moment to realise you were the one screaming.

A torrent of calming and comfort and relax swept across the bond towards you. He was trying to comfort you. His eyes looked panicked and he swiftly knelt down by the bed. His touch made the screaming stop, but you were still hiccupping with sobs of fright.

Your alpha bundled you into his arms like you weighed nothing, holding you gently against him. He started purring, trying to ease your distress.

The door burst open and there was Natasha with her gun and Steve and Wanda and Pietro. The other Avengers soon followed.

Your alpha snarled and hid you behind him, dropping low into a defensive stance. “Shit, he’s gone feral.” You heard Sam curse.

“Lower your weapon.” Steve ordered. The others hesitated, but did so. Your alpha’s snarl turned into a low, warning growl. “Easy, Buck.” Steve raised his palms to show he had no weapon. “We’re not going to hurt you or your mate.”

Your alpha curled up protectively in the nest you’d made by stealing people’s clothes, you safely in his arms. His flesh, real hand laid gently on your belly which had only just started to show. The pup inside you kicked happily.

Your alpha eventually somewhat looked like what you remembered; he’d changed his stealth gear for casual clothes lent to him by Steve whom he seemed to recognise as his brother or packmate, perhaps. For all he communicated in grunts and growls and whines, he did everything you asked.

He never pressed sex which you were grateful for. Despite the fact that, half the time, you were horny, you didn’t really want to be reminded of the life you’d lost.

Wanda was constantly concerned for you and gave your alpha, Bucky, the stink-eye. Pietro out-right disliked Bucky and frequently refused to acknowledge him.

Everyone else… remained civil. For your sake.

Bucky managed to come back from being feral on a really rather uneventful afternoon. You and Steve were playing chess and your alpha was gazing adoringly at you, not paying much attention to the game until he suddenly moved one of your pieces. “Checkmate.” He chirped and kissed your cheek.

Durante ‘Dante’ Steven Barnes-Y/L/N was born during a storm at 2:47am.

Bucky held him like he would break at the slightest touch and he cried for days.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this instead of sleeping, now i have to go to psych hw bye
> 
> Comments and kudos are appreciated :)


End file.
